I’M AN ADULT! Kinda…

Quick Recap:

  • Met a guy
  • Two great dates back to back
  • Got stood up
    • Drank a whole bottle of wine and cried all night
  • He made giant apologies
  • Work ruined him taking me out the next night
    • Went out with friends instead, no big
  • Stopped hearing from him

Okay, so let me preface with: I’m not a needy girl.
I’m really not. I don’t need us to talk on the daily. I don’t get mad when you have a night out with your friends. I don’t even need to know all your friends. I don’t need gifts for all holidays. I don’t need or want to give you permission to live life. Do you, Boo Boo. Do you.

Now, when he stood me up, I was upset… BECAUSE I SPENT AN HOUR DOING MY MAKEUP, WHILE WAITING FOR HIM TO GET BACK TO ME, AFTER LEAVING WORK EARLY SO I COULD MEET HIM AT A REASONABLE TIME. I heard from him at 545, told him I was home around 6, and to let me know when he was ready to go out around 615… and then slowly wilted into a crying, sad, wreck with fucked up crying-face makeup as time went by and I heard nothing back from him. I didn’t text him 800 times. I didn’t call him drunk. I just wallowed in my misery drank a bottle of wine, and asked my friend in Australia why no one loves me…
Like a fuckin’ adult.

The next day, I got a message at 730am. He was sorry. He didn’t feel good, and laid down, and had just woken up. Did I believe it? Not entirely, but the guy is super crazy nice, and I liked him, so I was gonna let it go.
Like a fuckin’ adult.

He asked if he could take me to lunch. I told him I had plans, but that I was free that evening. We tried to make dinner plans, but with my fucked up stomach, we agreed to meet for drinks and I’d take him around town instead. I decided to do my makeup… so I looked great, and then about the time I was like 10 mins from the place and our meeting time, he let me know he wasn’t going to be able to make it… because work called him. While I was REALLY disappointed, I just resolved to go hang out with my friends at karaoke, and maybe when he was done he could come by.
Because I handle my shit like a fuckin’ adult.

He never did come by. I checked on him around 1am, and he was still at work… so I just enjoyed myself as best I could and figured I’d hear from him again later. I never heard from him again later. I zapped him some texts… a cute vid of me hanging out with my dogs… but he didn’t really wanna text with me, as far as I could tell from his texts back. They were just the obligatory kind of response that you get from people that HAVE to respond but have nothing to say. So, I just tried to leave him alone.
Like an adult.

But here’s the thing… I’m not REALLY an adult. My generation isn’t adults. Millennials fit NONE of the criterion for adulting, aside from getting jobs. We don’t like to adult. We don’t identify as adults. We will prolly never really understand the finer points of adultism, in general. Millennials just aren’t built for it. We wanna continue to play with Legos, and never have to make a phone call to setup a doctor’s appointment.
SO… I called him out on ignoring me over FB messenger today… before I had time to stop myself and be an adult… cuz like I said, I suck at being a really real adult. I didn’t make a big thing of it, though. I just talked to him normally… and then sprung on him that I felt like he’d been avoiding me, and this was me “metaphorically jabbing [him] with a stick.”

I didn’t confront him and be like, “what the fuck is your problem?” I just wanted to let him know that I wasn’t mad, I guess. I mean, I’m kind of mad that he’s been ignoring me… but I’m not mad about the missed dates. Shit happens. I was trying to understand his behavior, and it felt like he was under the impression I might not wanna see him again. He didn’t try to talk to me, but he still regularly interacted with me on social media… He didn’t ghost me, he just kept a distance… so in my terribly awkward way I tried to him know it was okay.
Which just made shit awk, obvi.

HIM: I’m sorry. I wasn’t trying to ignore you.
ME: It’s okay. I just like making social encounters more awkward than they have to be. It’s like a hobby. 😛
ME: Anyways… I’ll let you get back to your family. ^_^ emoticon Hit me up sometime.
HIM:For sure
Well, I dunno if that sounds as awkward as I feel like it sounds… but I was just like… OH GOD NO WHAT DID I JUST SAY?! HAHAHAHA…. GONNA GO DIE NOW…
So, that’s about where I’m at…
Will he call? I dunno. Least I made an effort, I guess….
Mostly I just wanted this to work out because I’m SO SICK of the dating scene… People are terrible, and they’re worse when you’re trying to date them. I just want someone to go out with me on the weekends… why is that so hard?
{insert joke about a hard dick here}
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5 thoughts on “I’M AN ADULT! Kinda…

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