Dan & Phil Tour!

So I took my mom with me to see Dan & Phil in Denver, because I have no friends and didn’t wanna go alone…. And like… I love DanIsNotOnFire and AmazingPhil…
She didn’t get it… But like…

A, I’m 27… so she laughed at me for being at a thing that was mostly filled with teen girls…. fair. Totes fair.
2, She laughed at me for being so excited about something that was mostly filled with teen girls… also pretty fair. (I do not usually relate on anything with teenage girls… even when I was one…)
D, After the show she was like, “You are an ex-goth that listens to that heavy metal crap, watches gory ass horror movies, and curses like every sentence… isn’t this a little TAME for you? Why are we here?”

Yes, mom. Dan and Phil are very clean-cut, tame, and generally adorable… I have varied interests, just like you taught me to.

What did you think I was taking you to?
A Gwar concert?
You wanna go to a Gwar concert with me, Mom?
We can come home covered in fake blood (maybe real blood), fake piss (maybe real piss), and really real bruises.
Wouldn’t that be fun to take my 61 year old folk-music loving mother to?
I bet she’d enjoy that.


The show was totally G-Rated… and totally cute. I definitely didn’t understand all the teen girls screaming like they were being murdered, though. Like… teen girls have a lot of emotions… and I understand none of them. It reminded Mothership of the time she took me to an NSYNC concert, and everyone, including the grown women, just SCREAMED LIKE THEY WERE BEING MURDERED the entire time. I dunno why it happens… I don’t do that…

My mom is so weird, though… cuz she already knows I have a broad taste in stuff. In all stuff. I’m an art geek. I listen to ALL KINDS of music. I read. I love movies. I play video games. I like going out. I like staying in. I like black, but sometimes I can be interested in something pink… Like… she knows.

She also knows that if I were gonna take her to something, I’d warn her first. Like, I’d love to take her to a Marilyn Manson or Rob Zombie concert… Slipknot is coming with Manson to the Pepsi Center… and I totes wish I had funds to get tickets… cuz that shit would be hilarious and awesome. Back in the day, Mom was always like, “I bet under those masks Slipknot is just a bunch of pizza faced nerdy kids… you’re worshipping nerd kids…” So… taking her to a Slipknot concert would be HILARIOUS.



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