Got Hack; Still Feeling Lonely

So earlier this month my Spotify account got hacked.
Of all the accounts someone could have hacked… I guess I got lucky.
::knock on wood::

It was really weird, cuz I went to listen to something and my app said I was listening to music from a Vaio. I haven’t owned a Vaio in YEARS (like 2 laptops ago, and I keep laptops until they die horrible, painful deaths). What was WEIRDER is that I was supposedly listening to some guy that sings in French. While it’s not beyond me to listen to foreign music, as my many German, Korean, Japanese, and Spanish speaking playlists exemplify, I’ve never listened to anyone French except this chick who sings in English with a thick French accent: I’ll Kill Her – Soko

So, there’s a handy “Log Out Of Everywhere” feature on the Spotify site, and I queued that up from my phone, since I was at work, and knocked the person out… Just for them to get back in and try again. I find that hella frustrating. What I found completely unacceptable and fucked, however, was that they DELETED ALL OF MY PLAYLISTS. Now, I know that if you delete a playlist, Spotify saves them for like a year and you can go into the Spotify site and resurrect them, but at the time, all I knew is that all my music, that I spent YEARS putting into playlists that correlated with feelings and purpose and shit, was gone. I’m extraordinarily sentimental for a heartless Android Girl, so I just FREAKED OUT.

Spotify, to their credit, was very helpful. They first confirmed that I was the account owner, since I have Premium, and then locked the whole account. They had me make a new account, and dropped in all of my playlists and music library, as well as migrating my followers, and for my trouble they gave me a month of Premium for free. So, it was a stressful couple of days while I waited for them to get everything sorted, but in the end they did a great job at customer service.

The couple of things they couldn’t move, though, were my Daily Mixes and my radio stations. Kind of good and bad. I’d accidentally removed System of a Down from my rock/metal Daily Mix, and I’d hemmed in my Marilyn Manson radio so far down that it almost exclusively played Mason. Lol. So, I’ve been trying to build those back up, but it’s been slow. I finally got a couple of Daily Mixes today, though. I have an emo/rock station, which amused me endlessly, and a kpop station. Lol. That says so much about my personality that I never wanted anyone to know. 😛

I’m using this block quote as a page break.

In unrelated news, I’m still sad and lonely.

Depression is weird. I feel like I want to be around 100 people and socialize and laugh and maybe get wicked drunk, but if anyone wants to do anything with me I immediately want to find a reason not to see them. Like I want to be around people, but I don’t want to go to anyone’s house, or wherever they are going for the evening, or to the car show which I invited David 2 to… like…I don’t know why my feelings are like that. How can you crave people, but hate the idea of leaving your house? It doesn’t even make sense.

On a more comical note, after all that bullshit with Kaiser where I ended cancelling that psychiatric nurse phone call and just making an appt with my normal, off-Kaiser physician (see 2 posts back), the Kaiser mental health facility that I had called keeps calling me. I don’t answer, because phone calls are for psychopaths (and I am a sociopath, thank you), and I’ve noticed that the calls are getting more concerned as time goes on.

Voicemail 1: “Hello, this is ___________ with Kaiser Mental Health. We received your referral from a psychiatric nurse phone call earlier this week, and we were calling to schedule you for services. Please call us back at (phone number withheld).”

Voicemail 2: “Hello, this is ___________ with Kaiser Mental Health.We received your referral from a psychiatric nurse phone call on Monday, and we have not heard back from you on scheduling services. Please give us a call back at (phone number withheld) at your earliest convenience.”

Voicemail 3: “Hello, this is ___________ with Kaiser Mental Health.We received a referral for you last week, and we haven’t been able to contact you to schedules any services. Please give us a call back at (phone number withheld) at your earliest convenience, and ask for the triage unit.”

Voicemail 4 (today): “Hello, this is ___________ with Kaiser Mental Health. We’ve been trying to contact you in reference to a referral phone call you made last week. Please call us back at (phone number withheld) to speak with the triage unit about scheduling services. I hope you’re doing well. Thank you.”

That last girl sounded real concerned no one has heard from me in a week. Lol. I know it’s not nice to enjoy someone’s concern, but I really do. After going rounds with them just to find out that they couldn’t do anything for me until mid-May anyways, it definitely felt like they could give a shit. So, I’m enjoying the increasing concern. Tonight I’ll figure out how to email them and let them know that I’ve sought care elsewhere, but in the meantime it’s hilarious.

But yeah… that’s where I’m at… trying to alienate myself from everyone, while also aching to be around them.


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