OREGON IS SO GREEN

 

I spent the last week in Oregon!!!  And oh my gawd, it is SO GREEN!!!

Snapchat-198430322.jpgMonday morning I flew out to Portland to spend a week with my best friend Billie. She moved there about a year and a half ago, and I finally had money to visit. PDX was confusing… they have a lack of proper signage, but it’s still a pretty nice airport.

Since Billie lives about an hour south, in Salem, we spent the afternoon in downtown Portland. It was weird, because downtown Portland looks a lot like Downtown Denver… just smaller. We had lunch at a food truck (yay Gyros!) and then grabbed some Fraps at Starbucks before heading out to Salem.

When we got back to her place, her hubby was waiting for Injustice 2 to activate! They got it specifically because I was coming out. That was super nice. Billie made gumbo and we lost incredibly to her super skilled husband.

Snapchat-1847588434.jpgTuesday, we went into downtown Salem. It’s not much of a downtown, to be honest. It’s six blocks and most of it is mall, but we ate at Coin Jam and played House of the Dead! It’s like a less busy 1UP. I really liked it. After that, we went to Book Bin where I picked up a book on Einstein disproving the existence of Vulcan (cuz I’m a goddamn nerd) and a Twin Peaks novel for mom and I. It was great. I love me a good book store.

Wednesday we had lunch at a small brewery called McMenamins. It was cute. I taught Billie how to sample flights of beer. Then we strolled around downtown Salem and she showed me a store that flaunts a spooky ass haunted doll, amongst other weird antique kinda things.

snapchat-1618068878.jpg After that, we went to Starbucks, so I could pee, and I looked at the menu and ordered a “Hand-Shaken Iced Tea.” The clerk just looked at me and was like, “what… flavor?” So I glanced at the board, and they had black, green, white, and I think red tea. I assumed that was my bad and asked for black, cuz I love me some black tea. He was like, “That is the vaguest order I’ve ever heard.” So… attempting to remain calm, cuz I still really needed to use the bathroom, I was like, “Okay, but it’s on the menu above your head?” And he literally turned around, stared at the menu and was like, “oh my god it is… no one has ever ordered that…”

So, I confused the barista by ordering a basic iced tea… so that was a weird adventure I’ll never forget…

Thursday was my FAVORITE DAY.

20170518_142405_061.jpgBillie drove me to Newport. Now, you have to understand that Newport is NOT close to Salem. Also, she intentionally took some back roads to make it really fucking scenic. So, we were in a car for two hours. I played DJ, because I had music saved to my phone and she didn’t. Fortunately, the thing Billie and I like about each other the most is that we are VERY malleable in the preference department. So, she had fun listening to all my weird synth electronica and metal covers of 80s songs.

We drove through Dallas, OR, which was surprisingly cute. It has farms, and then just some random suburban looking homes. It also has a small business area with like, little local businesses, grocery store, and I think they had a Walmart. I couldn’t help but think how much it looked like a small southern town, and how much mom would love it.

Mom really misses seeing nothing. As Denver, and Colorado in general, grows, we tend to lose the nothing. It’s like the opposite of The Neverending Story.

She picked Newport because 20170518_114716_055.jpgthey have an aquarium, and that aquarium has a Giant Red Octopus, and I love octopuses… Especially giant red ones that are located in small coastal towns.

So we wandered around the aquarium. They had this ridiculous eel that was totally a ham for the camera. He was enormous! And I totally wanted to pet him… but they don’t let you do that.

We also played with the petting pool… and I felt bad about that, because of that scene in Finding Dory where they all scream and hide, but it was just sea cucumbers, sea anemones, and starfish. Sorry. Sea stars… the lady in charge made it REALLY clear that they are not at all fish and that we are in charge of being sure the younger generations do no refer to them improperly.

20170518_105446.jpgWe got hugged by the anemones. We pet the sea cucumbers. We pet coral sea stars, leather sea stars, and… something else that felt more like leather than the leather stars. The leather stars felt slimy and gross…

After the aquarium we had lunch at a little brewery that was right on the coast. Like, it’s so much on the coast that there were fishermen in rubber coveralls having lunch there, and cleaning fish out back. Oddly, they did not serve seafood. I guess when you live on the coast it’s nice to have pulled pork and burgers, since you deal with fish every single day. We both got flights of beer, and chatted, and it was really nice. We thought of doing a tour, but didn’t. Instead, we hit the beach.20170518_141510.jpg

Here is a picture of me running toward the beach… I was REAL excited. It was a nice overcast day, and the whole week was in the 50s and 60s, but I was still hecka excited to be at a beach and smell salt water, and see dogs running in the surf!

We went to Nye Beach, and it was hella fucking cute! It reminds me of home, back in Pensacola, but with less weird hick locals… Billie insists Oregon has hicks, but I didn’t see any. The houses were adorable, everything was hecka green right up to the cliffs, and the sound of the waves was everything.

20170518_142405_061.jpgI’ve never been to a Northwestern Beach before, and it was interesting, because I’m used to dunes. Pensacola has a protected dune habitat that I grew up walking. It’s squishy and makes your legs tired, but is great for that classic beach aesthetic. Northwestern Beaches are dramatically different. For one, there’s the cliffs. Ain’t got cliffs in Pensacola. Also, the sand is hard, hard as concrete under your feet. It was weird! But the beach was nice. We checked out some tide pools and sat on a log to watch the waves for a while. It was a great way to end the day and prep for the long drive back. We decided to head back to the apartment a little early so we could rest up before going to a movie.

That evening she and her hubster took me to Cinebar, which was really nice for little Salem. It’s just a movie theater that serves really real food items… we didn’t eat there, though. We saw Alien Covenant! And it was great. I mean, it’s not the first or second movies, but it was a great sequel to Prometheus, if you ask me… and this is my blog, so you kinda did… 20170518_181346.jpg

There were some other storylines that went on while I was visiting. A, I managed to art! Billie let me use her colored pencils, and for the first time in months I managed to produce some good pieces. They’re just little illustrations, but they’re good, and making them made me feel good. Here is one of them. I really like the expression on this one.

20170515_072906.jpg2, I read a book. I brought a couple of books with me, because I assumed I’d be awake before everyone (I was correct) and I needed something to do on the plane rides. I managed to kill Fahrenheit 451 pretty early in the week, and I started The Never-ending Story before I left. I got some Snapchat-282850064.jpggood reading in, and I felt really good about it, because I haven’t been great at reading consistently. It takes a lot more concentration power than I’ve been able to manage most of the time. While I was bummed that my flight to Denver was delayed 40 minutes, it did give me more time to put into reading. So I guess that wasn’t too bad.

D, I was on a mission for Billie’s cats to love me. Billie’s had Galaxy for years, but Galaxy is a very small, declawed, black cat that hates people. At least, that’s who she used to be. While I was visiting, it was amazing! She was out and yelled at people to pet her… It took a couple of days, but she warmed up to me pretty good. The real Everest was Tara. She’s new, and she’s weird. She’s real skittish, and doesn’t even really like Billie or Aaron that much. I pretty much stalked that cat the whole time I was there, because I wanted her to love me. When she kept clawing the carpet, I volunteered to hold her while Billie clipped her nails. Then I held her while she made sad cat noises… Lol. She didn’t really LIKE that, but afterwards, she didn’t really run from me anymore. I wouldn’t say we bonded, but Thursday she let me pet her on the head for a good long while. So… it was pretty successful… Lol.

I’m not looking forward to going back to work. While I was gone, things just got…worse. I’m so tired of my job and the ridiculous people there who can’t follow procedures, or think for themselves. There’s some borderline shifty shit happening, that I will refrain from explaining for possible legal reasons. But… I put in some resumes for some Oregon dealerships. I would love to move to Newport. I even found a super cute home that I think Mom and I could live mostly comfortably in (can’t leave her here). My resume went to a lot of places not in Newport, though. I gotta find a job first. I can catch up on housing after I maybe secure income… But I want out. Out of my job. Out of Denver. Out of Colorado. I want something new, something different. Billie being a couple hours drive away is a real motivation to move, too. I miss her so hard, and she hasn’t made any friends yet…

So… that’s where I’m at. I’m in love with the idea of leaving. I miss Billie already. But I had a really good time.

Also, I’m starting a diet tomorrow. It’s the 21 Day Fix. I wanted it to be pretty easy. I won’t be doing the home workouts, but I figure I can walk in the evening… that’s a good start, cuz I am SO FAT.

But yeah… PICTURE OF AWESOME FRIENDSHIP!

20170518_144031.jpg

One Week

One week from today I’ll be with my Billie in Oregon.
I’m very excited about it. I’ve missed her so much.

Billie and I met by happenstance. Her boyfriend had posted a Craigslist ad for someone to hang out and watch horror movies with. Billie was a lot more interesting than her boyfriend. It cracked me up, because when they split Billie didn’t want to tell me they broke up; I dunno why. When push came to shove, though… I helped Billie move out and she got me in the breakup. Lol.

I couldn’t have known how much I’d like Billie. She was just so… HER… all the time. Whether she was a goth or a hippy, she was overwhelmingly her, and I loved that. I’m not sure I’ve ever just been me, so I guess that’s why it’s such an admirable quality.

When she moved away with her new boyfriend, I wrote her everyday until she broke up with him and came back to live in my basement for a while. Her boyfriend sold everything he owned in an “I Love Billie” yard sale, and hopped a flight to come back for her. It was super cute. They lived with me for a bit, but then got their own place, and eventually her job took her away from me again, this time to Oregon.

It’s been sad not having her around, because no matter what I want to do, Billie would do it with me. Band she’s never heard of? Let’s go. Alt punk fashion show? Totes in. Video games and pizza? No hesitation. Billie is just that kind of person…

BUT I GET TO SEE HER NEXT MONDAY!!!!!!!

So… yay countdown.

Staycation

I’ve been on vacation, but I didn’t go anywhere. We call that a staycation.

I made a big list of things to accomplish while I was off. Some were more realistic than others… I made a small dent on the list. Not nearly enough got done.

Wednesday I managed to wash Bdo and clean the kitchen; they are both still mostly clean. It wasn’t my most productive day…

Thursday binged watched RuPaul’s Drag Race… but I also bought new underoos. So… kind of productive?

Friday I was sick… like legit sick, too. Lots of vomiting and migraine symptoms were to be had, followed by an evening of pacing the living room in an attempt to cure the mystery abdominal pain that showed up at 2am. It hurt bad enough that I thought of going to the ER… but I didn’t want to pay the copay. I paced for about an hour and a half, and then managed to lay down in a position that didn’t hurt. It was a rough night. Also, the pacing irritated the shit out of the cat.

Saturday was the grand opening of Torrid at a nearby mall! So mom and I got up and went to stand in drizzle in the hopes of landing a gift card. We did not, but the whole store was buy one get one 50% so we bought some stuff! I got a sports bra, and it’s the most comfortable thing I’ve bought in ages. Debating going back to get more of them. We also hit Charming Charlie for some accessories. Then we had lunch. I’d been fine till after we ate, and the abdominal pain came back… so we came home and I just hung out the rest of the day. I was feeling better in the evening, so Bird and I went to see our friends play. It was a fun night, AND I got a guy’s phone number. So that’s weird.

Sunday, Mom and I went back to the mall. We hit TJ Maxx, and bought too much stuff, and then went to JC Penny, cuz Mom wanted dresses. We found no dresses. JC Penny was confusing. It was so hard to find women’s clothes… Then we hit Dress Barn, and then I went off to a movie with Bird. We saw Boss Baby, and I’m seriously curious how a Christian group hasn’t latched onto that movie to boycott it for being WAY homoerotic. After that, I came home and played FFXV while talking to Markimoo over the PS4. He even watched some gameplay and helped me out.

Today was… an emotional day. Everything I tried to do failed, and just getting up was really hard. I did manage to clean the dog run, even if I cried through it; and I got blackout curtains for the front window, which I also cleaned. I bought a curtain for the laundry closet, just so I don’t have to look at the cat box anymore, too. Then the cat threw up on the bed. It wasn’t overly productive, but it wasn’t a great lazy day, either.

I’m hoping to do something in my room tomorrow… hang up clothes, put shit away… it would really help round out staycation. Lol.

Staycations

I haven’t been on a real vacation in a few years.

I think the last real vacation I went on was to see Davy in San Diego back when he was still in Law School. Unless you count that terrible trip to Las Vegas with that crazy girl… But I don’t count that, as I spent the whole time trying to decide if I was going to throw her over the balcony or sneak out in the middle of the night and catch a flight home. I don’t count that trip. I actively cringe at and try to forget that trip.

Anyways, last week I was on vacation. That means what it always means… I stay home and try to get some housework done. It isn’t like, a GOOD vacation, but at least I wasn’t at work, I guess. It was nice to wake up later than 6, but otherwise it wasn’t actually a great week.

The Sunday before staycation was Mother’s Day. I got Mothership the NES game Burger Time, and a Retron 5 to play it on… but the Retron 5 didn’t work… nor did the other two I got after that… so, I just got my money back and I’m now on the market for an NES… or maybe another kind of retro gaming system. I did make her breakfast, and we hung out Saturday and she hung out at my place on Sunday. It was uneventful but fine…

Monday I mowed three yards. It was hard and terrible, because they were getting a bit overgrown and not one of them is level. Tuesday I did nothing. I was just depressed, so I decided it was a sick day. Wednesday I did a little bit… but not much, and then went to meet this guy I know from Facebook for a drink in really real life. He’s nice, but only wants to be friends… and because his schedule is so dramatically different from mine (he goes to bed at 8pm) I will probably not see him in really real life again. Thursday I tried to work in the living room… boxed up DVDs and stuff to put in the crawlspace, because I’m not ready to part with them but they take up too much space. Friday I mowed my backyard… and I think I cut it too close… and if my whole lawn dies it’s totally on me… plus I discovered all the wasps living in the various boxes on my property. So… not great.

Friday I also skipped out on my friend’s 30th birthday party. I had the intention of going, but I thought about it really hard and couldn’t think of a good reason to go. Is she a nice person? Yes, totally. Have I known her a long time? Since high school.

The reason I skipped out is because I didn’t want to go and I didn’t think I’d be missed. I don’t like karaoke. She loves it, so that’s what she did for her party. I also don’t feel comfortable in a social setting. Either I say something that makes me realize that I don’t relate to people at all or no one really speaks to me and I end up drunk from drinking my drinks too fast, as a way to cope with being socially awkward and ignored. Drunk me also has a tendency to try and socialize even harder, only to end up saying something moronic or offensive, so this doesn’t help me at all.

There’s also this thing that bothers me about my friends… They don’t show up.
I haven’t had a birthday party since I was 21. My birthday is inconvenient, as it’s Halloween, but also I never have anyone to invite to a party. My friends don’t come to parties that I throw, and this was first illustrated to me when at my 21st birthday party so few of MY friends showed up that my live-in boyfriend had to invite a bunch of his friends to come over so that I wouldn’t be depressed. This concept was reaffirmed when I had a picnic… invited a bunch of people, and only one person besides my mom showed up. I have a blog post about that, but it’s too depressing to link.

It’s just a thing… I’ve decided to stop bending for people. I’m lonely, sure, because everyone I know is a terrible friend, except the one in Oregon… but she’s in Oregon…. so… whatever.

This feeling will pass…

Point is, it was a depressing staycation… I accomplished almost nothing important, and I have no social life.

Updates: All Crammed Together

I keep saying that I’m going to make a YouTube channel… but I just can’t figure out how to start. I’m thinking of just posting videos with the air of, “Yeah, I’ve been making videos for years. If you like it, you should subscribe and be part of the cool kids that follow me on YouTube. New videos every Sunday.” Essentially just fake it until I get any kind of real following. I’m not sure if that’s a good approach or not, but it’s what I’m thinking of doing.

Just imagine it… I get some followers who freak out, because I’m perpetually referencing things that happened in videos that were never actually made…
“So as you might recall from last year…”
What? You only have four videos…
WHAT DID I MISS?!
And then if/when I get any kind of actual following I can do flashback skit vids, in which I dress like a scene girl or a goth or something, and pretend I’m 12… and just say something a retarded kid would say in a YouTube vid. Yes… I kind of like that idea. And my real vids will be shot with my nice Nikon camera… and I’ll shoot my throwback vids on my laptop cam, or ipad cam… yes… that could be a lot of fun, and it can be a running theme of my vids to do flashback skits… hrm… ideas.

Is it sad that that’s almost all I have to talk about right now?
Yeah, kinda.


Let’s see… so I had a three day weekend. Thursday when I got home, though, the ceiling panel to my attic space had fallen out. That’s spooky. That’s how god damn horror movies start, for fuck sake. So I was paranoid as hell about that… That was really the perfect topping on my good day gone disappointing, for you see, I was supposed to go on a date. Date cancelled last minute… and actually, when I looked at their profile this morning, they’ve deleted themselves from the site entirely. So… that was shitty. Friday, after NOT being murdered by the chick from the Grudge, who I was certain prolly lived in my attic…

Grudge

This is exactly what I envisioned waking up to in the middle of the night.

I didn’t really do much Friday, to be honest with you. I wanted to. I’d love to accomplish all kinds of thing with my days off, but I suffer from a complete lack of motivation to do anything unless it relates to me being able to keep living… That’s literally the only reason I get up in the morning for work. So I pretty much did nothing…

AND THEN THE TORNADO SIRENS STARTED.

If you don’t know, we have weird weather in Colorado. April blizzards, give way to May thunderstorms, which cause floods, and then trigger June tornado season, which will, in turn, evolve into high temperatures and the whole state being on fire during July and August… It doesn’t rhyme, but it’s the accurate analysis. So there I was, I was at home, deciding to do the only thing I’d done all day, which was to get Chipotle for lunch, when the sirens started to go off. I am terrified of tornado sirens. I don’t know why. I’ve never been in a tornado. I’ve been in hurricanes, when I lived in FL, but not tornadoes. We’ve seen tornadoes here, living close to the plains, as we do. We’ve seen one nearly touch down on our street, though it didn’t do damage to anything. Mostly, though, the ever steady march Eastward makes the chances of getting legit hit by a tornado in my area smaller every year.

Still, the fucking siren is god awful. I guess it’s because no one associates that noise, which I refer to as an air raid siren, with good thing. They never sound a siren when you’re winning a house, or when candy is going to fall from the sky. Sirens mean that we are under attack or that mother nature herself is debating if she’s going to murder you today. Also… SILENT HILL.

I joke about Colorado being a lot like Silent Hill, all the time. We get weird fog. We have air raid sirens. We catch on fire a lot, so it can rain ash. Plus there’s that whole mountain terrain thing. All in all, Colorado isn’t nearly as terrifying as Silent Hill, but we have many discomforting parallels.

The only editing was to make this image sepia and drop in the characters... Like I said... Colorado is much like Silent Hill.

The only editing was to make this image sepia and drop in the characters… Like I said… Colorado is much like Silent Hill.

Anyways, I ventured out in spite of the sirens and got my beloved burrito bowl. When I got home… there were more sirens. The sirens probably went off every 30-45 minutes for the rest of the day. Even if you aren’t scared of the sirens, that’s REALLY FUCKING UNNERVING. It didn’t help that the weather and radar apps on my phone would go off right after the sirens to confirm the tornado warning, nor did it help that the only person I managed to get a hold of was my terrified friend 2 miles away who was locked in her house drinking wine and sending me SnapChats of “YES, IT’S FREAKING TERRIFYING. I SHALL LET YOU KNOW WHEN WE ARE GOING TO DIE.”

Fortunately, the panic attack about dying passed as I got closer to when I needed to get ready to go to derby. I hadn’t been to a Women’s Flat Track Roller Derby bout in a long, long time. I was really excited! But I also hate going to the venue. Lol. The Fillmore, while lovely on the inside and definitely historic as it opened in 1907, has really shitty parking in a shitty part of town. There is NO WHERE to park in that area. It’s insane. But I found a spot 2 blocks away, and I thought that would be good. The bout was great. Here are some pics.

Fillmore 20150605_181151

After the bout we went to the Wendy’s next door. Here’s the thing about that… this is all on Colfax: a notorious street in Denver famed for housing meth heads and prostitutes (who are assumed to also be meth heads). In spite of the work they’ve done to try and revitalize Colfax, mostly by turning parts of it into an art district, this particular area is still pretty much a lot of meth heads. So the Wendy’s had a bunch of them sleeping in the front… and one woman wandering around trying to score more meth… She could have been 30 for all I know, but she looked like the Crypt Keeper with boobs. It was awful.

So my friend convinced me to hit karaoke, and I convinced her husband to take us to my car, since he wasn’t gonna go to karaoke and I didn’t wanna walk 2 and a half blocks past that many meth heads. They come out at night like some kind of nightmare creatures. I can only assume they live in the sewers, as I never see them during the day. They are not to be confused with the masses of homeless that live on Colfax, either. Those are two VERY different groups of people.

Karaoke was a bore. I don’t even actually like it anymore, but I like seeing my karaoke diva friend, so I staid for like an hour.

Saturday I got woken up by a text from the Saturday receptionist at work. She was headed to the ER, so that meant someone needed to cover her and help train the new Saturday receptionist… I called boss lady and told her, so boss lady went into work, and finally managed to get two office girls to come in and split the day with the new woman. That was good, because before that it was looking like it was going to be me… and I was so bummed about it, since I was supposed to be on vacation.

Mom and I saw Insidious 3 that afternoon. I can’t say it was GOOD, but I didn’t feel like I wasted my money. I’ve never been that fond of the Insidious franchise, but it was the only thing that sounded interesting. It wasn’t too bad, which is all you can ask from most horror these days.

Sunday, Mom came over to assess the hole where my attic panel should be. Then we went to Lowe’s without measuring it… eventually decided on a fix that didn’t require ANYTHING from Lowe’s… and then we hit the pharmacy and the grocery. I thought I was gonna overdraw my bank account at the grocery… I’m always so broke this time of month… but I didn’t! And that’s what’s important.


Today boss lady proposed a raise and job change to me.

Our old title clerk left for a better job a while back, and her replacement, for lack of a better word choice, sucks. She doesn’t know what she’s doing. Everything gets rejected, and while they write ON THE RETURN FORM why the title got rejected, she’s incapable of correcting it, noting the error, and not doing it again. She’s also terribly disorganized, and has no idea how basic and easy this job could really be. It’s been infuriating for the boss lady, and annoying to me, because I have to hear about it.

So… boss lady suggested to me that I learn titles. Then we’d train some other people to do my job.

I’m pretty sure I can do it. It’s very repetitive work… I’m uniquely organized at work… and, hell… I could use a raise.

So… that’s exciting. I’m really happy about it.


I am NOT happy about my dating life. Every time something fails it just feels more and more like I’m never going to find anyone. Also, I get grossed out every time someone wants to fuck me. It’s just gross. Like, can we get to know each other before I compromise my comfort level to accommodate what you think is a basic human need? I understand normal people like sex. It’s supposedly very fun, and great… but like… I don’t. I want someone to hang out with and drag to metal shows, and lay around with me on a Sunday while we play old video games and order Thai food…

No one is into that idea… And it’s totally devastating.

I think dating was easier before I realized that not feeling sexual attraction and not liking sex is a thing with a name and a community. Sex was just part of the deal. You put out to lure them in… and… it’s just something you do in exchange for their time. Now I’m like, “No… why would I want to fuck you? Can’t we NOT do that, but do everything else in a relationship? Why am I the one that has to compromise? Also, while we’re at it, can you NOT be a clingy, sappy, totally grosstastic mess over me? Like can I just live?”

Being asexual and aromantic, as interesting as it is, and as nice as it is to have words for my feelings…. is fucking terrible. I mean no one wants to die alone… but the only way to get someone to stay with you is a relationship, and the only way you seem to be able to entice people to a relationship these days is by letting them fuck you… and I’m just plain grossed out by all of it. In the event I could land a relationship, I’d figure out the sex part… but like… do we have to start there? Do we? Cuz I fucking veto that. It’s unacceptable.

I actually had someone tell me today that sex is basic human interaction.
NO. No it is not.
Think of all your friends, relatives, acquaintances, and people you meet on the bus. If you have fucked all those people… then sure, maybe sex is basic human interaction. If you have not, then you’re like me and can relate to people without slapping your genitalia together in a sweaty repetitive motion. Like… what is the world like for that person? Have they fucked their parents, grandparents, school teachers, and grocery cashiers? I need to know.

Even my most sex positive, totally promiscuous, polyamorous friends don’t fuck EVERYONE THEY HAVE EVER KNOWN. A lot of people, sure, cuz that’s their lifestyle and it’s great that they can have those kinds of open relationships with people… but like, they haven’t fucked me, or their relatives, or our mutual friends… which implies to me that FUCKING IS NOT BASIC HUMAN INTERACTION.

So… yeah… I’m gonna die alone… and everyone in the world that wants to fuck me is apparently is terrible.

Staycation & Thanksgiving

So, I spent Monday through Wednesday at home. My bosslady gave me some time off, because I’m awesome and a hard worker. I’m back at work today, though. I work today, tomorrow… maybe Sunday… No bueno.

Still, I had a good enough staycation. I have to call it that, because whenever I say vacation, people ask where I’m going… If I go somewhere for vacation, chances are high that I won’t tell anyone anymore. I didn’t even tell anyone that I was off this week, except my friend that lives in Cali. The vacation worked out well, because he came for the holiday. I managed to work an evening with him in between cleaning house and painting the basement (still not done with either, but it’s a step).

We had a very nice evening. We started with dinner at Russell’s Smokehouse. It was delicious. I never thought I would pay $24 for shrimp and grits, but it was really worth it. That was amazing and I have no regrets. Afterwards, we had cocktails at the Green Russell. I love the Green Russell… and there’s a reason.

FLASHBACK

My friend and I were having a weird drunk day, that neither of us quite remember, and after traipsing up and down 16th St Mall, and then wandering around aimlessly when we ended up in Larimer Square. We’d never done much on Larimer Square, so we asked a penny cab driver what there is to do.

So go down here and go down this alley. Then, you’re going to go down this unmarked staircase and walk into a brightly lit pie shop. Tell them you’re there for drinks.

I’m not even kidding. That’s what the guy said. I remember it so clearly, because my friend and I looked at each other and briefly discussed if we were going to die. Against any better judgement that we might have had floating around in our heads, we did go down that alley. Actually, alley is really the wrong word for the area. It’s just a kind of breezeway between buildings, that is nicely lit and very unlikely to harbor rapists and drug dealers. Larimer Square is quite pretty, as far as urban areas go. Anyways, we found the staircase and, just like he said we would, we walked into a stark white, brightly lit pie shop. The floor is black and white checkered, and there’s just a nicely dressed friend of ours staring at us.

It really was quite odd to run into a friend from high school working in an underground pie shop / speak-easy. That’s really what this place is alluding to, is a speak-easy. It’s pretty cool. You tell them you’re here for drinks and they lead your through a door that looks like it leads to the kitchen. You’re immediately submersed in an entirely different atmosphere. The area is dimly lit and they play low music. It’s relatively quite, and if you get a phone call they ask you take it in the phone booth at the back of the room. There’s a very large, very nice bar with mixologists (which are not the same as bartenders) behind it. Also, behind the bar is a hydroponics room where they’re growing orange trees and things they use in the drinks. The drinks are very unique, in that you can’t get a rum and coke. They use all natural everything and it’s very high class. It’s probably my favorite drink spot in Colorado.

Russell’s Smokehouse is in the same little basement as the Green Russell. So now, you walk down a staircase, into a brightly lit pie shop, and there’s a large ornate wooden door leading into a nice underground smokehouse restaurant. The Green Russell is still through the door that just looks like it goes to a kitchen, though. I love it.

We had a few drinks at the Green Russell. I had a Black Friday and a Dutch Apple Pie… Tasty. My friend had something really strong, and then something called a Wacky Waving Inflatable Tube Man… which was also very strong. Lol. It was fun. We sat and chatted, and made fun of people sitting nearby when they did something odd. We talked about a lot of things, like the attractive mixologists, and how while he’d like to do something naughty to them, I’d like to read a book with them, or watch a movie, etc. It was fun. I always have fun with him.

We got tired of paying high dollar for drinks and were going to go catch a movie. We didn’t get there in time, so we went to the little beer place next to the theater before going home. I like that place. It’s usually fun for no reason. Casual-like.

Thanksgiving was pretty uneventful for me. I don’t have a large family, or the family of a significant other to deal with. I just hang out with my mom. We got up and went to a movie at 10. We saw Penguins of Madagascar… because I am secretly 6. It was really cute, and written to cater to the adults that would be in the audience. Nothing dirty, mind you, but it was just fun and cute. I loved it. John Malchovich makes a good villainous octopus. Afterward, we came home and she cooked cornish hens, and I cooked skettie squash to go with.

In the midst of this, two of her dogs got out. Moe is a Jack Russel terrier mix and an escape artist. He always escapes. It’s just what he does. Ava is a very small chihuahua/terrier mix, and this time she followed Moe. So Mom always panics when Ava is missing. She’s just too little… but she found Ava pretty quick. I, on the other hand, had to go find Moe. He’s a jerk and doesn’t come when you call him, and he escaped into the storage place behind the house. I grabbed him, though… pulled him through a fence and everything… little jerk.

So I go home, call mom to tell her that I have him, and walk into her house to find HOMEWARD BOUND: THE INCREDIBLE JOURNEY on her TV. I like HB. It’s a cute movie from my childhood… except the end, where Chance and Sassy come out of the woods, but the old Golden, Shadow, isn’t with them… and you’re panicking, because Shadow is important, and his human is upset and sad. My period came early, I just caught a dog, and… I started bawling. THAT MOVIE IS SO MFING SAD. It was devasting… but then we watched the second one before flipping around to some other PPV stuff. Lol.

It wasn’t an epic staycation, and it wasn’t an epic Thanksgiving, but it wasn’t bad. I got to see my best friend from Cali, and I got to NOT be at work… So that’s a win in my book.

Vacation!

So, I am off to Vegas on Monday.

I had planned a week of vacation for next week over a month ago… Two months, even. I was just going to hang out in my house and enjoy not being at work, but then opportunity fell in my lap.

We have a family friend that recently moved back to my home state. Her daughter is turning 21. For that momentous day, her mother booked a flight to Vegas. Since her mom recently got a new job, she couldn’t go… And this trip happened to be on my vacation. So I’m going.

Free flight.
Free room.
All I have to do is play nice with the daughter.

She’s nice enough. Psycho, perhaps, and proved, but nice enough. All I have to do is stay on her good side. I think, as a different breed of psycho, I can manage that.

She wants to smoke a lot of pot, do some drugs… Imma drink and have a good time, myself. If she gets arrested, I will call her mom, but that’s about it. I’m just excited to be leaving the state.

Still, I will miss my dogs, and my mom.

When I think about how much I will miss my mom I realized why I haven’t jumped state. I like to pretend that it’s because I can’t afford it, but really, I dunno what I would do without my mom. I’m nervous of going without her. I’ve been out without her, when I went to California to see a friend for a long weekend, but this is new territory. This is going to the City of Sin with a stranger. I’m nervous as hell. But I will have fun regardless. I’ve decided.

I’m also sad to miss my favorite local band opening for Lacuna Coil… Which I was supposed to go to with my bestie. But… Free is free… And if she got the opportunity, she’d go too, even if she can’t see that right now.

Anyways, I am going without any tech… Which will be weird for an Internet junkie like myself… But I think it will be good for me. I recently figured out that I might be giving myself carpal tunnel from my excessive typing… My hand has been killing me for days. So… That will be an adventure, too.